• Says bridal train, shower alien to Islamic wedding practices
A renowned Muslim scholar and the Chief Executive Officer (CEO) of Vanguards Academy, Ijebu-Ode, Ogun State, Ustadh (Dr.) Zafaran Adeniyi has expressed concern over some practices in nikaah which he described as alien to Islam.
He noted that these practices, including bridal train and shower not only waste time and resources but also spotlight women unnecessarily during the nikaah celebration.
Dr. Adeniyi made this known in his remarks at a recently held Nikaah in Ikorodu area of Lagos State, Southwest, Nigeria.
Speaking with Muslim News after the solemnisation, the popular author of Islamic literatures including his most-read, Scenes of Zina, described nikaah as a serious contract in Islam upon which society is built.
“Nikaah is an institution because it is half of the deen. Nikaah is a very serious contract upon which a family is built by two people into the larger society. It is not a joke at all. It is a contract between first, man and God and then, man and woman,” he said.
The versatile Islamic scholar explained that Prophet Muhammad (SAW) warned Muslims of imitating practices that are alien to Islam.
“What is the source of bridal shower, train, etc? What is the objective? Are they in tandem with the practices of the early Muslims? The Prophet (SAW) has warned us that a time will come that the Muslims will be copying people such that if they enter a lizard hole, they will follow them. That’s what’s happening with our nikaah today,” he said.
“Now, the point is that this bridal train is an unintended thing that has implications. The bridal train wastes our time; Islam is about time. Everything we do is about time: salat, fasting, hajj. So, our nikaah is not an exception. Besides, you’re not only exposing the new bride but also all the sisters that followed her, to men who are supposed to lower their gaze.
“Even inside the mosque, there is a way the women comport themselves not to talk of a public function of males and females where you bring young and old ladies together, parading themselves as bridal train. They will even use a lot cosmetics. Some even do hena that will be revealing, something that is meant to be concealed. Yes, it’s allowed, it’s part of women beautification, including earrings, neck chains, other jewelries but not meant to be seen by non-mahram. They do hena on their hands without wearing gloves.”
Advising that the bridal train which has been introduced to nikaah ceremony should be removed completely, Dr. Adeniyi said Muslims are supposed to be moderate in celebration.
The scholar also highlighted some of the excesses in the practice of sisters night, noting it’s now coloured with flamboyance and unnecessary disturbance to the neighbourhood.
Sisters Night
According to him, the sisters night is supposed to be an avenue to counsel the bride.
“Even the sisters night these days goes to the level of flamboyance and extravagance that you could not even explain. Sisters travel from Kano to Lagos because of sisters night. Don’t we have other things to do? Disturbing the neighbours? Islam is about peace; the neighbours have a right to their time, except if permission is sought from them or they also participated in the sisters night. The sisters night is good. It supposed to be a night of counsel to the about-to-wed bride, but the manner and way in which some sisters are doing it needs to be looked into.
“The extravagance too needs to be checked. At times, we try to copy others because we want our own to equally be a big occasion, so that people will be talking about it; the hall decorations, the chairs. We just spend money lavishly on nikaah that’s supposed to be ‘ibaadah.”
Dr. Adeniyi, however, explained that the said bridal shower, train, and other alien practices do not necessarily nullify the nikaah ceremony, once the aqdu is properly done.
“Those practices do not nullify the nikaah. It is just like a person who doesn’t pray the salat well, he will still be rewarded but may not be 100%. The major thing is the aqdu, those four or five conditions. That’s what makes the nikaah. These ones fall under walimah.”
Musicals in today’s Nikaah
Speaking further, the Islamic scholar said the musicals played in today’s nikaah to entertain the audience do not also meet the Islamic standard.
He emphasised that Islam is very clear about the place of music, with no exception to those with Islamic colouration.
He said, “The moment we deviate from the foundation, we will have mountains of things that we have to start justifying. It has become a norm that they play musicals at Nikaah. All those musicals that they are playing are all music, forget the Islamic colouration. Islam is very clear about music. They cannot be justified.
“However, since it’s nikaah and we want to have a moment of joy, there are nasheed that have no musical instruments and can be sang, especially by the underage girls at the event. It’s only going to serve as a learning stage for them to make public presentation and relaxation for the audience. We can also have ewi (balad presentation) and things like that. Entertainment at nikaah should be in line with Islamic provisions.”
Mass nikaah saves economic, time resources
Ustadh Zafaran Adeniyi said mass nikaah is allowed where the audience are similar, noting it saves economic and time resources.
He added that families can put resources together to organise mass weddings for their children.
“We call something the fiqh of reality. It is not that it’s a rule but it’s a kind of suggestion, instead of sending money individually and separately on nikaah that has the same audience. Islam gives us common sense, by bringing the audience to have the nikaah for our children, in group or mass nikaah. From the economic angle, it is wise that we come together. From the angle that we have to manage our health and time, I think it’s (mass nikaah) equally okay.
“For instance, you might attend different nikaah in all the four to five weekends in a month, at different venues even inter-states and those who involved in the nikaah have the same audience, or community, or belong to the same Muslim organisations. Instead of organising individual nikaah, we can put resources together, by doing mass nikaah for all of them, since we have the same audience.”
Sponsored
I concur with his view 100%.
But the issue is atimes even if the couples understands all these concepts well. It is usually very difficult to convince their parents to by-in.