The Lagos State Community Central Mosque Auditorium, Alausa, came alive on Wednesday, August 13, 2025, as Nigerians and Kenyans gathered for the Couples’ Dinner 2025, themed “Shared Lives, Shared Lessons.”
The event blended warmth, reflection, and cultural exchange, aiming to inspire and strengthen marriages through Islamic guidance and practical wisdom. It marked the first joint edition between the two countries, featuring distinguished speakers on marriage, polygamy, and family life.
Speaking with Muslim News, Dr. Abdul Hakeem Abdul Lateef, Chief Imam of the Lagos State House of Assembly, emphasized the vital role of marriage in shaping society.
“Marriage is so important because it produces children who either manage or damage society. Many criminals are victims of broken marriages,” he noted.
Addressing polygamy, Dr. AbdulLateef clarified its purpose in Islam—offering social protection to divorced and widowed women often overlooked for first marriages.
“If you have women who are divorced, no man is going to take them as a first wife. These are the people for whom Allah has provided the second, third, and fourth slots,” he explained, stressing the need to educate society on its benefits.
Speaking on cultural influences, the former Chairman of the Governing Board of the Nigerian Deposit Insurance Corporation (NDIC) highlighted Yoruba polygamous traditions, noting that Islam regulates them by capping wives at four.
According to him, “Culture generally is good until the culture contravenes Allah’s decree. In our culture as Yoruba, our people are generally polygamous. The difference is that Islam regulates it—no more than four wives—while in other settings, there is no limit. Some who claim to be monogamous may have countless concubines. Only Islam regulates it.
The culture contributed to people’s acceptance of it because many of us were brought up in polygamous homes. Even though our forefathers may not have practised it with Islamic values, we now see that doing it as Allah decreed is far better. Culture shows in our speech, our dress, but any practice that contradicts Allah’s decree is the one that is wrong.”
Drawing from personal experience, the seasoned Islamic scholar revealed that his household of four wives, 20 children, and eight grandchildren lives in harmony without division or favoritism.
“You cannot get to my house and know who gave birth to who. We are a beautiful family that has learnt tolerance, love, and doing things together,” he said.
He shared his principles for peace—service to Allah, zero expectations, and fairness in decision-making.
“I have zero expectations, so I have zero disappointment. When you spend on your wife, see it as if you’re spending on yourself because Allah will return it to you,” he advised.
The dinner also marked the launch of “Navigating the Thread of Polygamy” – a 100-page book co-authored by the Deputy Director of Strategic Planning and Corporate Development at the Voice of Nigeria, and Head of the South West Zone, Dr. Mujeedat Abdul Haleem Olagunju and varsity lecturer and President, Institute of Islamic Finance Professionals, Nigeria, and Professor Tajudeen Yusuf.
Dr. Abdul Haleem-Olagunju explained that her journey into the project began after attending the 2023 “Beyond Polygamy” conference in Kenya, where she met Ms. Rahma Wafula, Ms. Lula Aginga and other Kenyan sisters who later travelled to Nigeria for the first-ever polygamy, couples’ dinner in Lagos.
The Deputy Director at VON expressed gratitude to Allah for the success of the just concluded programme on polygamy awareness and book launch.
Dr. Sulaimon Ogunmuyiwa, a leading partner at M-Solution Consulting International Limited and one of the panellists, underscored the importance of continuous marital education.
Dr. Ogunmuyiwa emphasised that couples in polygamous unions should take premarital assessments involving all parties, maintain open channels of communication, and co-create a vision for the family to keep harmony among multiple spouses.
The Chief Imam of Lekki Central Mosque, Sheikh Dr. Ridwan Jamiu, called for honesty in marriage and acceptance of what Allah has allowed, emphasising that it should be approached with knowledge and capability.
He also cautioned women against resisting their husbands’ decision to take a second wife, warning that such opposition could have serious spiritual consequences.
On polygamy in Kenya, Rahma Wafula, an entrepreneur and psychological counsellor, noted that Muslims make up less than 40% of the population, adding that polygamy isn’t openly practiced and relatively rare in Kenya compared to Nigeria. She admitted, however, that while some Muslims and non-Muslims have more than one wife, many do it secretly.
The evening ended with his call for emotional discipline in decision-making: “When a Muslim knows how to decide without sentiment, he or she will live well.”
The Couples’ Dinner 2025 left attendees with renewed inspiration to build stronger marriages, embrace Islamic principles, and foster family unity across cultures.
Sponsored
